Wow. I had my first altercation with someone in Tallahassee this weekend. It was with J & L, a couple who are engaged. You see, at my (luau themed) party this past weekend, I was wearing a grass skirt and no shirt. L gave me a titty twister. I told her that it is my policy to retaliate in kind in that situation, save for the first one (girls get a warning, guys don't). I don't know if she didn't believe me or what, but she did it again, so I grabbed a hold of her nipple-area and turned. You'd think that she might stop then, realizing that I was serious when I said I'd do it back. She didn't stop. Nor did I. During this time, I was holding a beer in one hand (or I could have maybe used that hand for defense), standing next to Ashley, while J was in another room.
The next morning around 8am, I got a phone call from J that went something like this: J:Do you remember what you did last night? Me: When? J: -refreshes my memory on the incident described above- Me: ya. J: That's unacceptable. I can't believe you would do something like that. I thought we were cool. I don't know what to say. Me: Apology along with explanation of my policy. J: I don't care about your policy, you just don't do something like that. Further expressions of anger and disappointment. After that phone call, I couldn't get back to sleep for about an hour, even though I was exhausted after being awake until 6:20 that night.
I would think that after being with J for 7 years, L would know that he would react like this and that she wouldn't have initiated a nipple grab, let alone kept going after I warned her that I do it back.
Monday after school, I went to J's office and L was in there too. I apologized in person. J told me to "keep my distance." I told him that I would honor his request until he told me otherwise.
I checked later on Monday and found that L had un-friended me on facebook. I think that's the first time I've noticed an un-friend.
Nipple-retaliation has ALWAYS been my policy, and I've NEVER had a problem with it before. It never crossed my mind that something this grave could be the result of minor horse-play. I guess I've never hung out with a bunch of engaged/married people before coming to grad school. It's something to consider.
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2 comments:
I don't think it's an engaged/married thing, I think it's an uptight insecure fiance sort of thing. You warned the chick and if she wants to play games she made her decision to play along. Her fiance shouldn't get mad at you for retaliating but at his fiance for doing something that would upset hime. I love you <3Shell
I concur.
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